Dear Gino, I know you may not believe this but how you feel right now can change. Please please call a family member and have them take you to the hospital. You need to have help. Now. You are in an extremely vulnerable and sensitive state. Your family would want you to call them. You are not a burden. This can get better. 9 years ago I thought about it every day. Ending my life because I was useless and more than useless I was damaging. I thought that was the only worth I had to my family. But that is not rational thinking. You have been basically ending your life with gambling. Going down a dark path. I reached out to family and for medical help. It was not easy but things slowly started to turn around. I wouldn’t have missed a thing this past 9 years. I am happy to be alive. To be here with my children and family. The gambling and depression and other things are all intertwined. But you can get better. Please, go to the hospital. Tell them what you have been thinking. Your health and sanity are worth more than any job or what anyone thinks. This is a mental health issue. If you had a broken leg there would be concern. I’d rather have a broken leg!!!! You understand what I mean. Be brave. Get help. Please.
