[I_Maverick]

Really struggling today. This morning I have been very selfish. Everything has been about me and not my family. I have this urge to destroy myself and everything. I feel as if I cannot get better but I must. I must do it for the same of my family. My little boy doesn’t deserve a dad as pathetic as this.

I have so much work to catch up on. The most important thing is to focus on my tasks and feel good about myself. To be proud of a god days work. It is such a long time since I have done one of those. The depression added on top of the relapse is killing me.

Any advice on how to get through today on how to focus and forget the past and just work on now is gratefully appreciated.

I will post again this evenng.

Love to all and thanks

Mav