[jen3]

Day 11. Had a thought of blowing the day off and gambling…. Not today, not going to happen because I do not want to wreck the weekend coming up spendt chassing losses. (Chain smoking, shuffling money around, adding and subtracting, blah, blah, blah ). Heck even if I were to win it would just set me up for future loss. Besides it’s not even about winning or losing anymore, maybe it never was. It’s just a bad habit that offers nothing but chaos. It makes me angry that It would even cross my mind. I suppose I will always have to deal with those thoughts. Praying they lesson with time. Going to try and be the best version of me today. The gambling me is the worst version. Turns me into a rabid pitbull. Ugly!