Came of the tablets as they were giving me some really bad side effects. So back to Drs Tuesday to re-evaluate what can be done. Went out got drunk last night first time in a while. The day was fun but then I messed it all up coming home. I gambled. Right back to square one. Feeling it today on all fronts and not helped at all by the major hangover!
I detest my weakness. Hate myself for what I did. Saturday I have my female friend coming. Luckily I withdrew some cash so am not going to be flat broke. But I have not made it easy. I am not here for sympathy I am here cause I suppose I have no where else to go. Last night gambling was a blur. The loss was £200 . Just as I was starting to see sense and make small steps it all collapses. Work output virtually at zero today. Sick and tired of always loosing to the addiction.