[jansdad]

Been having serious urges today. Just when i thought I had it down so cool, they came back with a vengeance.
I had a couple of really good weeks prior to this – no urges, didn’t even think about gambling too much. Don’t know if I got too complacent and thought I’m off the hook. How very foolish.

I’m trying to rationalize, I know a 100 or 200 euros online won’t kill me even if I lose, but I’m asking myself why, why, why? I don’t need gambling. And I know all too well it will not be just this one time. It will NEVER be just this one time.
And even if I won, will a couple of hundreds or even thousands change something radically in my life? No, it won’t. So I got nothing to gain and everything to lose.

What a nasty addiction this is.