Here i am closing in on 9 weeks gamble free. The hard part for me is to get my Fiance to trust me. She thinks i am gambling even when i can prove i haven’t been. It is hard for both of us, given that this addiction is based largely on deception and hiding. Lets be honest, any of us can be pretty sneaky if we think we need to put a bet on.
So the first Grand Slam of the year is back on. We usually try and get a few matches in for the tennis. I know she will be thinking in the back of her head that i will be gambling on it. But i wont, im done for definite, even though i will admit it will be a test to stay away.
But now it leaves me with the predicament that i will have to go home and reassure her that i wasn’t gambling. Does that seem fair always having to justify your actions (or non actions) ? Is it another form of punishment for bad choices, like having to pay gambling debts with hard earned money ? None of the above most likely, it is just the way it is until we can get past it. I suppose its something that will just take time.