Thank you to everyone who has checked in on my thread. I am happy to report that I continue to be gamble free.
I just saw this quote from one of my earlier threads.
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“One more day to go before payday.
I have got by and thanks to a mini miracle I actually am having quite a good end to the month.
I feel the usual sense of relief. I know in a day and a bit my month’s wages will be in the bank.
My mind is doing its monthly spend on silver sparkly curtains, good quality grey paint and of course the savings towards the new kitchen. This is a monthly “mind-spend” which never materialises. The first day I buy nice groceries and even some clothes – by the end of the first week I am back to the usual struggle and unworn clothes are returned.
I have a telephone appointment to discuss the residential programme. Now that’s it is payday and I have survived, recovery has lost its urgency. Residential treatment doesn’t seem so necessary. I feel I can do it alone.
I guess I have a bad infection of stinkin thinkin”
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I can’t believe reading back that I now have the silver sparkly curtains, the good quality grey paint and a beautiful new kitchen. I have learned to save, wait and believe. I never have that horrible misery as payday approaches. I have happy home with lots of laughter which I feel able to invite people into.
It took a huge effort to stop gambling. I still attend support group weekly. However, every day is a joy. My life is unrecognisable. All the things I so needed the big win for I now have after just a few years. Best of all I have peace of mind.
I cannot recommend residential treatment strongly enough….it’s free, it’s short and its powerful. We all deserve it.xx