Hi Kin those are all really good questions to ask ourselves. I’m glad to hear your looking at the things that can help you stay on the right path. Recovery is alot of constant research and learning. Even people with 20+ years are constantly learning new things and those people inspire me the most because they always have new ways or important messages to share. I was in a meeting last night where the focus was on blame. I needed to hear that we tend to focus alot on our external world for why we act as we do. When really it comes down to us making the choices we are. We can grown up in alot of trauma and disfunction but at the end of the day we choose to use our negative vices to cope. Nobody puts a gun to our head to Gamble, or use substances, or practice other bad behaviors. We addicts do that ourselves and make the choice to. I always had a reason for why I was doing what I was. Like if only I didn’t have these bad things happen, or these people didn’t hurt me the way they did or blah blah blah (insert victim mentality here). The only person to blame for anything that happens to me for the most part is me. Some things I can’t control like how others behavior or actions are but I chose how I handle those senerios at the end of the day. Do I use my addictions at it or do I chose to go about my life in recovery and face my emotions and feelings dead on.
