Hi lauren2021.
Welcome to the forum and well done on taking a positive step.
I can associate with so much of what you have written, chasing losses, feeling anxious because you can’t immediately place a bet to win money back. Putting blockers in place but then later finding a way around those blockers etc.
One thing you haven’t mentioned trying which I think could really help is having someone else you trust manage your finances for a while. In this scenario, you would still maintain control over your money, and decide where it is spent, but any spending would have to go through this person first.
I also strongly recommend checking out one of the new members groups, there is one tonight at 19:00(UK). You mentioned you attended 4 meeting in 4 days before which is great, but I know when I first joined the forum and was taking positive steps, I found the new members group the best place to get direct actionable advice on steps that can be taken.