[Kevin1098]

Hello,
I have been struggling with gambling for as long as i could remember. I have lost everything more then once now. I have gone bankrupt back in 2010. Sold everything and had to barrow money from friends and family to help me in that time.

Fast forward to 6 day ago. I had money and credit once again and also RRSP’s for the very 1st time in my life. You would think i had my shit together. Well i messed up once again. Started 4 days ago with walking into the casino and now literally today i lost the last of my RRSP’s that i cashed out.

So today is day 1 again of being broke. I hate this, HATE IT. Why can’t I take this pain that i feel and transfer it into hating gambling to have me stop. I have read books on quitting and heck i even tried coaching people to stop. I felt strong at one point as if it would never happen again. And now look at me, i randomly googled a forum page created an account and here i am typing this for strangers to read. Or not read who knows.

I don’t expect anyone to feel sorry for me as this isn’t my 1st time and i clearly new what i was doing i just wasn’t able to stop my self, as if someone else had control over me..

I though maybe it would help if i wrote this down for someone to read, for i can’t let anyone close to me aware of this. Have to put on a happy face that everything’s ok and carry on. No money left to gamble and no money saved for the future.

Just typing this got me to cry, ha what a joke i never cry not even when people have passed away yet here i am be hide my computer typing to strangers on the internet informing them of my dark secret and i am crying.

Like a bad dream I can’t wake up from.

[Sean1979]

Thank you for visiting the site and creating an account. I’m a newbie to this site too especially as i’ve lost quite a bit of money too recently.

Your narrative is very open and honest and is similar to how I am feeling with myself and people. We are all actors and a happy smiley face is one of those appearances we have to put-up for some people. I’ve been a moody, sad and unpredictable idiot to my partner and she has no idea of my gambling losses. I’m being an actor to her when all I want to do is come clean, but, it would break her heart.

I’m not going to soothe you or tell you that everything will be OK because i’m new to this and I don’t know what is going to happen. All I know is that I can fight this battle through sheer drive and enthusiasm to succeed in making money from other sources away from gambling and I hope you too can address your gambling with something as positive as I currently am right now.

Good luck,

Sean

[JayKay82]

Hi Kevin,

I have been on this site for many weeks now, one thing is for certain, you can quit and stay away for good. I am currently in the situation where i though i would never quit, but here i am 4months later, NOT GAMBLING. One truth and piece of advice i can give you, you have to do it yourself. There is no magic quick fix, you just have to say, no i am not gambling today. Easier said than done, give it time and effort and you will see it pays off very quickly.

PS You have to hit rock bottom to come back up, i wish you the best on your recovery.

[charles]

Hi Kevin, well done on looking for help.

Read the other stories here, you will see alot that you will relate to. You will also see the success stories – what are they doing that you can apply to your own situation?

How about going back to that casino – with NO money on you- and get excluded?

There is a lot of support around these days, When you went bankrupt did those around you know the reason? Did you use support to stop then?

keep posting and let us know what positive steps you are taking.

[DNcanada]

Hi and my situation is the same as yours. I’ve cashed in all my rrsps and in debt up to my eyeballs. My son needs my help and I can’t help him. Although he’s created his situation also by losing at foreign exchange trading which is another form of gambling but he won’t admit that. I’ve bailed him out too much now anyway. He has to fix it himself just like I have to. I’ve just joined this forum and it’s helping already. I went to a woman’s support group tonight and it was good. I still have the urge to gamble though and the only reason I can’t right now is that I ran out of money. But it is a day that I did not gamble.

[Kevin1098]

Yes when i went bankrupt the people close to me were aware of the reason. I fought the urge and read some gambling books which helped for the time. Fast forward a some years to present day i had credit savings and then I relapsed hard (13k in 2 weeks).

Funny thing is, that no matter how much i lost right now i wanna gamble in the „hopes“ of winning it back or half of it. I wanna say i’m strong but the truth is no money to so that’s why i haven’t, to be honest. I try to keep myself busy and my mind off of it but it’s hard as i am broke and not able to purchase some groceries that i need.

I cannot share this relapse with anyone as it will only make matters worse and break peoples hearts. Thus why I am posting my thoughts here.

i’m 34 and not a penny or property to my name, heck i don’t even own a car. Starting all over again…

[Jonny123987]

One day at a time. You can’t fix your problems in one day but with slow progression anything can be accomplished.

[Autor]

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