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Its true I have lost a lot during these two past years. Since 2016 I have been gambling away all and every little money that I had with me.
It got worse as each day passed. Single bets turned to multi bets, small stakes to large stakes.
Then I got an internship while I was on my semester break. I thought it was the break I needed but it turns out it was just another step in my gambling behavior.
I began betting my stipend as soon as I got paid, and I would lose it all within minutes.
Hence I started borrowing money and seeking loans as I could barely afford to report to work.
At the end of it all I had not gained anything from that internship opportunity apart from a mere 20$.
I bought a laptop bag and that was it.
The new year came and I simply went on with my gambling life as if nothing had happened the previous year.
My debts grew larger as my gambling behavior grew more worse as well.
Time passed and I met my current girlfriend, she knew of my gambling habits but I resorted to lie to her that I had quit.
Towards the start of my 2nd semester break I spent money meant for paying bills such as water and electricity, gambling on my favorite virtual football.
She became furious and I promised her I will quit. For a moment I actually did. I went sober for almost a month.
I was able to go back to my previous internship program, and I was not feeling the urge to gamble.
Things were different this time, I was gambling responsibly. In the end I left the company with a good amount of money and I was proud of myself.
I spent it buying myself necessities such as clothes and shoes. I was even left with some spare change and that was when everything spiraled downwards.
I resumed gambling furiously & irresponsibly. Last night I had 40$ but as of now I have 30 cents.
It is because of this I decided to seek gambling therapy, before I lose everything I have including my girlfriend whom I adore & love dearly. -
Hello Festus and thanks for starting a thread in the Gambling Therapy forums
Here at Gambling Therapy we pride ourselves on being a caring and diverse online community who can help and support you with the difficulties you’re currently facing. We understand that this might be a tough time for you, particularly if you’re new to recovery, so come here as often as you need to and participate in the forums, access online groups and connect to the live advice helpline if you need one to one support. We’re in this together!
Here on the forum you can share your experiences in a safe, supportive and accepting environment. The beauty of writing it all down is that you can take your time and you will be creating a record of your progress that you can look back on if it ever feels like you’re not moving forward. So, share as much or as little as you like but do try to stick to keeping just one thread in this forum so people know where to find you if they want to be updated on your progress or share something with you.
As well as the forums New Members are invited to join Charles in the New Members Practical Advice Group On Mondays at 21:00 (UK) and Thursday at 19:00(UK)
And on that note….
I’m going to hand you over to our community because I’m sure they will have some words of wisdom for you 🙂
Take care
The Gambling Therapy Team
PS: Let me just remind you to take a look at our privacy policy and terms and conditions so you know how it all works!
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Dear Festus, reaching out is a good start. We may just be a virtual group of people from around the world with the same problem but now you have someone who knows your story and will support you as you work on this addiction. Someone you can discuss thoughts and urges to gamble with. Check out the groups, facilitated ones are earlier in the day and indicated. Ask the chat line for advice. In the beginning a lot of people with a gambling problem find they can’t manage money responsibly for any length of time. Find ways to restrict your access to money. And when you have earnings left over don’t hold them yourself. My first couple months I was given a small weekly allowance. But as I always needed to make family purchases I ended up with a bank card but I had to hand over receipts and the account was monitored. I felt a bit like a baby but on the other hand I had proven over and over I couldn’t be trusted when gambling. I also started gambling addictions counselling, to help me understand why i was gambling and risking important things like a 20 year marriage and my family home. It felt like my head was an auto pilot when gambling. I’d only come to when flat broke! Once I broke the gambling pattern and was abstinent, the counseling, my GA group, and this site as well as others helped me get my head on straight and enjoy life.
Welcome to the site.
Laura
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